It don't take a whole day to recognize sunshine...

©  NsM

lost in a daze days are lost
hold on tight just to let go
letting go just to hold on
rights are wrongs wrongs are rights
left or right whats' the fuckin difference it's a direction...
controlled or uncontrolled
wanting to need needing to want
unleashed to the world before the world unleashes you
captivated to fly away free free to be captivated
held without will wishing to be held
flying high as a kite lingering low afraid to crash
manipulated mindset like a trained smile
feelings of feelings
electrified flight through the veins
pumping venom
life in a form that keeps pushing one forward
knowing something nothing anything everything...
what does it matter?
so long as you feel...

Into the Soul of a Flame...

©  NsM

curled around a ball of fire
like a flame burning with desire
feisty enough to let off a spark
lifting afloat free to dance about
attracting attention
flickering a temptation
intensity building
a need to combust
withholding being till the spark cracks and ignites
liquefies pleasure
reeks of existence
touched by the raw
beauty intriguing deeper
perception penetrating
wanting to fuel
a need to spread!
shouting out colour
igniting without contact
reaching into layers
stinging like a burn
leaving a desire to zone!
deeper into nowhere
comfort from within
in a daze watching the flame...

Just Inside Words...

©  NsM

speak to me in a whisper
plead to me your case
whisper to me your silent silences
your secret whispers you want to hold tight
tucked away deeper then you are willing to go
what will you find that you are frightened to welcome...

could you possibly open more then you are willing to see'
do you still' will you still '
know how it is you close the door
build the wall
protect your being yet allow some to slip out...

hold close what you want protected
yet colour what you want to stop from turning grey
held deep
captive to light, to touch.
held until the journey is welcomed...
twisted manipulated desired relished succumbed!

all as one
don't be frightened as to what you may see
pieces of you are inside me ; that's me inside pieces of you.

i don't know?

inside me is inside you...inside you is inside me...

©  NsM

in the silence of my mind
i find comfort
thoughts collide but silence retains itself
nowhere to go
still inside yet leaping out wanting to be heard seen felt touched reached
words are merely words till they form a thought
something that intrigues the mind in deeper
something to run with
to free your inner being to shout from inside those voices that speak
tangled in thoughts that pour out and over each other...rapid and swift
alone they begin till they gather and build
transforming into more
helping you grow    to feel    to just know
listening to the words understanding what is in between them
conscience speaks voices answer
something to learn something to teach...understanding of the lesson
life is precious and time is sweet    happiness is bliss and misery loves company
journey alone or reach for others
captivating lives in an alphabet rhyme
expressing from that spot only you can go
allowing others in or letting yourself out
words are only the beginning...

Insane in a Question?

©  NsM

an over abundance of emotion
you ever feel special?

an over abundance of pain
you ever hurt to feel?

an over abundance of love
you ever feel your heart grow?

an over abundance of thoughts
you ever just know something? nothing? everything? anything?

an over abundance of life
you ever become overwhelmed?

an over abundance of you
you ever stop to see who you really are?

an over abundance of being
you ever just allow what is to be to be just what it is?

In a H e A r T b E a T...

©  NsM

my glistening heart filled with pain
it pulsates sadness from within
beating out tears to bring me to life...
making me feel inside out
keeping me alive
moving me forward
holding me tight
strong enough to build the toughest walls
yet soft enough to want penetration
a heart that longs to feel something radiant
be afraid no more for letting love in will heal
oh heart of mine don't waste no more time
capture what you want and make it yours
pump life into my veins
care into my heart
let me love without pain
teach me to live with all of my being
show me how to let out all that i hold in...

In a Circle...

©  NsM

in a circle all is together
connected
joined with flow
no beginning
no ending
simply middles of more or less
when one feels we all feel
when one breaks we all break
when one loves we all love
when one needs we all know to respond
a language of it's own
nothing needs to be spoken
for everything is felt
understood
like a life calling
just knowing you need it to survive
to feel complete
whole as one...
breathing life into the circle
inhaling being
exchanging of energy
in the circle for life...

I'm right here, here I am...

©  NsM

the full moon awakens my being
i become alive with life inside of me
desire to delve sets in
i prepare to climb deeper deep to a spot i want to linger into curl deep around
capturing middle ground
so in touch with the moment your soul speaks words
whispers life through your veins
pumps of passion     thrills of life      zest of being
in touch with you
deep within the comfort zone
a safe haven of beauty      a hall of memories      a path of light
a blank portrait radiant with colour...
connection of this and that brings you here
right deep in the middle of your soul living right down deep in the middle of your being!
i'm right here...here i am...

I am a selfish lil fuck and I have no problem admitting it :)

©  NsM

come closer
can i tempt you to take a candy
you know you want it
you don't care what happens next
you selfish lil fuck
seeking pleasure only for you
wanting the unknown
being tempted by fate
poisoned by lust
desire is the manner
wanting more then you can bite
biting off more then you can chew
your in deep now
do you need to look for a way out?
or do you dare take another candy ?
this is your test
...
self control
knowing you want more
but not wanting to be that selfish lil fuck who wants
...
eat up the whole bowl
long as you leave it
half
full
and waiting to tempt the next hand
that hand that reaches deep down and searches for that very last candy
it's what you do with it that turns you into a beautiful selfish lil fuck!

I'll Begin Here...

©  NsM


erupting emotion bursting inside
flames of colour
wings open wide
im not scared...im not alone...
soaring higher then i ever thought
spreading what i feel inside me
did you hear me
i feel something...
it feels like feelings... replacing numbness...deep from within...
inner to outer
overtaking
free to be...

i stand alone watching time pass before my eyes
time i can not take back
already passed and gone
standing still as a memory
who ever said memories must remain still?
bring them along to share
show them your ok
smile
pull a memory out of it's lil protective pocket and place it where you need it
allow your brick wall to crumble and be replaced
build a place so beautiful you can't help but make a door
open the door and let yourself free
look back at the wall and watch it transform
comfort comes from within ...mind open eyes seeing
knowing what you knew all along...feeling afraid afraid to feel
chin up   head high    arms out
feeling

if you see any of this your mind has just been warped...

                           



©  NsM


                   simplicity so rare the eye dosen't take notice...the mind adventures...seeking...searching....
                                                       MISSING what the eye can not see
                 open your mind and allow your eyes to see....see what your mind is protecting you from....
                                                       FINDING what the eye never notices
                                  you need to see with all your being....looking through closed eyes....
                                       focused on nothing yet seeing everything you ever imagined
                                                        feeling what your eyes want you to see
                                appearing before your mind...a mind that's free and open to accept and be
                  something not so perfect can suddenly change into the most gorgeous thing you have ever seen
                                                                       do you see it?
                                                 have you learned to see without using your eyes?
                                    are you willing to look at things with an open mind and closed eyes?
                                                  have you learned how to see with your soul?    
                   can you teach others to see if all they have ever known is seeing with site...vision...judgement...
                                       
                                            if you see any of this your mind has just been warped

If My World Was Left in a Shade of Grey...

©  NsM

if my words could reach arms around you they would
my mind could show you what my words can't say
if my heart could let you in just for a moment
my soul would tell you it has been branded
if my eyes stopped welling with tears
my story of being would flow
my soul would pour
if my hands could touch yours for only a second
my grip would show you what forever means
if my inner being never knew what soultouching feels like
i would have never learned to smile inside
if i knew the moment wouldn't last forever i would have held it tighter
for this is just what love might feel like...

If I can Feel so can You...

©  NsM

If colours blend and transform into beauty...
If the lungs inhale to suck in life...
If a smile can reach from one to another...
If a thought can carry you into tomorrow...
If a simple wish can become a dream...
If fate can hold you in a tight embrace...
If eyes can see more then words can speak...
If a soul can touch from miles away...
If words can be spoken from another's mind...
If a connection reaches deep down inside...can you still question...
what love is?
what can't love find?                                love comes in many forms...

I Want To Dream Again...

©  NsM

in a field full of fairies that understand how to fly
a place where no real people exist
no pain or tears
just pixie dust and angel wings
the smell of pleasure
air so comforting
lush
butterflies flutter
whispers of love in your ear as you pass on by
the smell of flowers intoxicating your mind
streams pooling into circles of circles
just incase you need to see a reflection...
a reflection that will let you see into your soul
with beautiful bubbles of all your being
a smile will form upon your inner
bliss
in the grass looking up into the sky
from morning dew to midnight stars
see what you feel...feel what you see
time withholding on the clock
dancing in the wet grass of the morning
the sound of your dreams awakens you...
from the comfort of your angel walk!

I Want More...

©  NsM


nipples yearning
pussy aching
clit pulsing
mouth watering
fingers eager...

eyes closed
mouth open
breath heavy
muscles tight
pelvic grinding...

hands frantic
fingers manipulating
hips mounting
pleasure building
eruption quiver...

I Picked You...

©  NsM

showered in love
heart flooded
beauty reaps
inward vines
reaching deep
submerging roots
branching life
colouring outerbeing
to attract
to intice
pluck what you desire
hold it forever in your hands
make a bouquet or a single beauty
a gift of life
the smell of love
layers of petals   petals of layers
love me  love me not
either way just fuckin love me
admire the magnitude solitude can deliver
alone as one or together as a bunch
beauty is the sight
from heart to stem
...even while your petals drop

I Like What I Feel, Even When I Cry...

©  NsM

here i sit touched from the inside out
my mind is full
my heart feels love
my emotions are so intense they are vibrating my soul
i feel!
one word or many
a thought or a thousand
one soul to another to another to another
a heart so filled with fuel it can't help but erupt onto others
paradise inside a soul
only harboring things of pleasure
all else is released in a flow of toxic tears
the kind that cleanse all negative emotion
leaving me feeling light and free
emotion so raw it becomes explosive
both inward and outward
i'm not afraid
it's ok to feel so long as i continue to just be...

I Just Want To Dream...

©  NsM

when life surrounds you in the real world
you wake long before the sun
laying still
hoping
wanting to be left in a slumber
but reality awaits
the brfb button is broke, believe me i have done tried
the moment my mind perks all is gone
slapped awake
no memory of any dream
do i ever?
where do i go to get them back?
just how deep does one have to dig?
one glimpse of something other then colours
a fragment
a word
a ...

From the Mind of a Crazy Lady...

©  NsM

when
where
why
i don't wanna
you can't make me
this is me...all of me!
your not allowed to alter that in anyway
for i like who i am because i am me!
me is who i am
simple as that
beauty is simple subtle and "nice"
isn't that what you want?
FUCK NO
that bitch bores me!
i rarely let her out to play
you would think i was crazy
next time i'll invite you to the lil party upstairs
where all 13 of me are in the same room at once!
i have done lost one of my fuckin minds...

I feel you as I see you becoming...

©  NsM

free to be
inside and out

no over thinking

just live in a moment
as small or as big as it may be
time can be slowed down
even if only in a thought
hours rewinded into seconds or minutes pushed into hours
in a moment where time is non existent
emotion thrashing together
swimming inside your soul
teaching you to feel what it is you need to feel
showing you what you are in search of both inside and out
holding tight to memories that need to be stored
comforting while you become
learning to just be...

I couldn't say no...

©  NsM

venturing outside the box to the unfamiliarity of not knowing

i am alive and i am free and i have control over me

blind eyes hide behind dark glasses

time can sometimes seem unbearable or slip so fast away

i was lost but now i am found

but ill still be waiting for the world to hear my song

i couldn't say "no"

...1 2 3 4 5 6 9 i am slowly going crazy 9 6 5 4 3 2 1...

©  NsM

touched on a level that there is no turning back from
there is no longer a place you can run and hide
for your inner being has been cast
words linger
meanings already formed
speaking in riddles leaves some puzzled
yet it exposes the mind that has learned to decipher
use your heart i was told... but it is my mind that wants to speak
or is my mind speaking from my heart?
puzzling my words to form riddles
questioning my mind to answer yet answering before it questions
can the heart really speak anyway?
or does it simply puzzle your mind with riddled heart pieces?

Hope is the wish...

©  NsM

i feel it today
it's easy to reach
my mind is bulging
sprouting with thoughts
of ideas of...
of some master plan to find who i am
or maybe to find love again
who knows till it happens
fate has all control
for i am a believer
even though i been done wrong
i believe in hope
it carried me here
held my hand
made me a fighter
taught me to win
even the battles fought from within
hope is fuel
energy to go on
to search for tomorrows and blow away yesterdays
like blowing on a wish
a wish for hope...

Hold out your hands i have something to share...

©  NsM

capture a moment in time and hold it forever in your hands
                                                                handle it with care
open up your hands and share that moment you hold so tight
                                                                allow it to touch
learning and sharing what comes from your most inner being
                                                                beam rays of shine
radiate life in so many forms you can't help but be alive inside
                                                                absorb all that fuels
needing to touch wanting to touch all that comes into contact
                                                                holding on so tight
find where you are and show yourself where you need to go next
                                                                handle you with care

                                               

    understand what you need to question...question what you need to understand

Here...

©  NsM

tip toe in and close the door
leave what you don't need outside on the floor
blaze it up suck it down
flip your insides up and around
upside down right side up
inhale for life
swallow to feel
mind lost in thoughts that warp
comfortable in a zone
trippen deep
swallowed whole
gravity holds you in
energy pulls you out
held in between is that spot you need
lingering
on your tongue
inhale to exhale
taking you in
holding you tight
showing you the way
to capture yourself
wanting to know you
that desire for more takes over......

Heat...

©  NsM

heat that radiates being
skin that shivers upon touch
lips that desire
the exchange of breath
skin so close you feel the heat electrify your insides
intensity
flesh wanting to clash
heat so hott your mind can not withhold
knowing what you feel
feeling what you know
preserve that feeling
seduction of the mind
explicit filter
depths subcoming what withholds
desperately leaping
sensing pleasure to come
finger to the lips of an evil snarl
the snarl that turns into an erotic smile
the art of alluring seduction begins
combusting with lust
bursting innerbeing
feverishly wanting to manipulate
delving around
desire to please yet wanting to withhold
temptation gives in and takes you to far
just a taste.......

Goosebumps...

©  NsM

hair raises UP...chills set in... sensation hits all layers ...and the goosebumps begin...
almost as if something is around you....magnetically pulling a charge from inside....
energy ....static....motion....aura....connection....wonder....excitement...question....
you feel it?? do you know what it is?? why it's happening?? where it's coming from??
questions...desiring more knowledge of others....expressing...
you think you know ....you think you feel...yet have no understanding or ration as to why??
the same goosebumped skin from being cold yet it happens from the inside out....
and the feeling lingers and leaves your mind way beyond curious....did you feel that??
look i feel that ...look what it did to me...gave me chills from the inside...look at my goosebumps...
hair sticking up...feel my heart beating...holy shit that's so wicked...yes i feel it!!!!

Gimmie a Fuckin Tissue

©  NsM

my eyes burn
they want to close over
protective blinks
flicking away the tears
droplets of being
relief as they flow
pieces of me in liquid form...

there is my smile
waiting to catch
like an upside down umbrella!

my smile turns off my tears
my tears search for a smile

letting out
free to flow
out of control
i cry to smile
i smile when i cry...

Fueled with Energy...

©  NsM

if i could show you something from inside you would you look?
if i told you how to see without looking would you try?
if i wanted to hold your hand and lead you deeper would you come along?
if i showed you something you never imagined would you share?
if i whispered a secret in your ear would you let it enter your soul?
if i asked you to cry for me would you know just what to cry about?
if i allowed you to enter into my world would you hold your spot ever so tight?
if i shared something of me would you learn something of you?
if i helped you to get lost so that you could be found would you trust?
if i grew silent and ran out of words to say would you know?
if i spoke in a foreign tongue would you still feel what i need to let out?
if i smiled and thought of you this very moment would you do the same?
if i laughed at you and pointed would you still call me a friend?
what about if i gave you a wedgie or poked you in the eye?
don't know ..... don't ask.... this is just what came up...

F>>Brain

A brain that is fucked allows the body to welcome pleasure...
penetrated brains are full of erotic charged energy!

F U Train...

©  NsM

                                backwards for a moment lost in a glance seeking shelter from a glare...
                                                             watching holding wanting...
                                                          captivated intrigued engulfed...
                                                         circle around spiraling deeper!
                                                                      .......STOP.......
                                                                       feel that spot....
                                                    hold yourself there...search for the soul...
                            find it in an aura...lose it in a moment if you clear your mind to quickly!
                                                           .....s  l  o  w     d  o  w  n.....
                                                  take it all in feel what your supposed to...
                                                                 learn experience share...
      don't question what you don't understand unless your willing to search where the answer comes from....
                                                                      keep feeling...
                                                                           deeper...
                                                                       send thoughts...
                                                                         understand...
                                                               feel that connection click!
                                                                       ........GO.......
                    hurry you only have this one split second to make that ever so important eye connection....
                                                     thing is you either feel it or you don't...
                                                                       it's that quick...
                                                      done...did it happen????? look away....
                   then ever so slowly make the second connection.....this  glance answers the question!!!!!
                                                                  ...........FEEL.........


                        if you don't believe people can see your soul threw your eyes, you should wear glasses...                                                                      
                                                       
                                                    who wants a ride on the fuck you train?

FRIENDS ...

fuck you I have enough friends : )

©  NsM

can one person ever really have enough friends? you know what i have learned in my living years...it gets harder to make friends the older you get! remember being lil and goin to the park or the beach and sharing your whole day with a playmate...escaping reality living in a dream, wrapped in a make believe world that is full of smiles and laughter, quiet moments that end with emotions...you know what else i remember about this, leaving the beach and my mom asking the names of the friends i had made? what? wait a minute...you mean i was supposed to ask their name?why didn't we ever stop to introduce ourselves, why did we have such a wonderful time yet forget to exchange names? i have something i need to delve into and learn...there has to be a reason behind this! anyway it's rare and that never happens as we grow older...nameless play with friends we just walked up to! life is short and can drive you crazy and make you a miserable fucker if you let it....don't allow that to happen! make it a mission to never stop searching for nameless friends...allow them to teach you who you are...show you who your going to be! "if you love something set it free...if it comes back to you it's your's" but why stop there? if you love something and set it free, spend your lifetime searching for that moment in time....the moment it sees you have come searching....fate creates a path, each person we come in contact with has purpose and reason, take time to figure out why fate brought that certain something or someone onto your path in life !!!!
smile if ya wanna...fuck off if you don't..

Forward Deja Vu...

©  NsM
...
sheltered from something yet hiding from nothing
i know what i don't know



anything
becomes
everything
becomes
anything



answered before the question existed
becoming the answer while the question is forgotten...


forward deja vu?

For Some Reason...

©  NsM

i miss you today for some reason
you use to reach for me...
i remember you today for some reason
you touched me deep inside...
i thought of you today for some reason
you etched words in my mind...
i LOVE you today for some reason
you held my heart together...
i heard you today for some reason
you whispered words of hope...
i felt you today for some reason
you were comfort on my soul...
i hold you today for some reason
you make me feel alive...
i smile for you today because i miss you!

Follow Fate...

©  NsM

Let it flow from wherever
feel it building before it erupts
take a moment to think
one step backwards, two steps forward
always one step ahead...
never falling behind because intention is always intact
questioning fate even though you have no choices
simple decisions are what you possess
your destiny already sealed
instincts are what guide you
listen to your soul speaking
you are meant to be a piece of this world
a puzzle in life
your being was placed here for a reason
it is up to you to discover it
let it flow upon others
all that fate has placed on your path
each being is meant to be touched by you, reach out for their meaning
understand the connection
for fate wanted it to happen
either in this lifetime or the last, travelling into the next
just follow fate
one soul lighting another lighting another lighting another...

Feel...

©  NsM

i stained my shirt crying colours
                                 feeling each colour slip out of me
           running down my cheeks
                                 burning inside my soul
                     i felt today
                                 i appreciated those i love
        showed them im not afraid
                                 allowed myself to feel
  i felt what others were feeling
                                 comforted from within

Fate on a Leash...

©  NsM

the thing about fate is you never realize just how deep you are untill you need a way out
life is the path we choose...just keep paying off your dept to fate
experience life seeing with eyes that are attached to an open mind
fate is just fate...you either believe or you don't
when lost in a moment of sharing there is no giving or taking
fate is long decided before it ever has a chance to happen
even though fate can fuck you right over...giving up is what'll kill you!


hold on to fate like it's the last thing you have to believe in!

Fairy Tales...

©  NsM

lil pet lil pet let me in
or i'll huff and i'll puff
and...
or maybe i'll be lil red riding hood tonight...
do you dream what your fairy tale wants you to see?
can you close your eyes long enough to believe?
would you feel your soul being touched?
or would you just lay sleeping?
almost lifeless
floating like a dream somewhere in-between
somewhere so close yet so far over the rainbow all you see is a trail
a path you have climbed
slip down the slide this time around
hold out your hands to gather
what brings you pleasure
bring it along
to never-land...the place you dream you could dream about!

Exposed, it's all or Nothing...

©  NsM

flowing out energy
your soul in words
exposing  inner being
so close yet so very far away
exchanging energy with a force
your provocative mouth seduces the mind
temptation so raw you taste it
want on your lips
desire in your eye
pleasure exploding out your fingertips
lust roaming inside
wanting to be free
tasted in each moment
staining what it contacts
splashing colour
spraying with full force
becoming
transforming nothing into something
touched
marked
soul wide open
expressing depth from layers deep in the core

Emotions Make Me Feel...

©  NsM

feeling
touched
reached


wanted
loved
needed

appreciated moments give inner strength!
held captive inside full of emotion that i feel!
comfort in words and thoughts...
meaning behind each gesture of love!
sentiment is valued, it reaches deep into the soul!
teaches us to love to be loved, shows others loving is alright!
the more you fill your heart with beauty the bigger your soul can reach!
a world can be connected with an invisible heart string!
from me to you or you to me, thoughts are all it takes!

joined
embraced
comfort

reached
touched
feeling

eh...

©  NsM

pieces of ones being flow as free as the words appear
moods become senses
mindset can be altered, manipulated and taken to a place you desire to go
aura can be felt, colours can be heard
feelings are shared with such raw emotion
almost on impulse yet they are thought right up to the moment before they are poured out
still forming as you travel deeper into your own soul to seek
opening onto yourself while you are learning how to share you...


twisted formations of more wanting to be discovered
just waiting for that oppurtunity to speak from your soul
realizing more with each thought, each word, each...
who the fuck knows really?
the deeper you go the more you find
comfort comes from deep within ones soul
...like all your favorite everythings
right inside the middle o f you!

all you have to do is slow the fuck down
and learn to live in each moment
just be...

pssst pass it on

...

©  NsM

...
she will continue to have pain her whole life; for she hurts those that love her.
...to test them
to see if they are willing to fight forces
...to challenge their being

one whom has never loved doesn't know how to let love in
pain makes their heart pump
filling the mind with toxins
love needs to replace, but can't be forced, or taught, or pretended...
it has to happen on it's own
yet fate is the one with all the control!

don't know didn't question didn't know don't question...

©  NsM

hypnotic being
floating from within
dancing on outer
shouting from inner
transfixed on being
lusting to be
holding a possession
tight in a grasp
high on more then life
connected by more then energy
inticed deeper
pleasure is passion passion is pleasure
pain
slapped with a dose
beats out rythm
makes your heart dance out
wanting to hurt
to know what loves about
willing to learn
ready to teach
more then you know...

Don't Even Bother Reading This...

©  NsM

would you be crazy enough to read words of nothing
searching for more
reading deep into blanks
letters molding together
transforming into whatever you want to appear
letting your mind loose
escape
amaze yourself where you go next
free to feel just let it out
understand
go where you want and then further then you ever imagined
so deep you wonder if that spot is normal
do others know how to go there and return
am i weird
do you know
follow or you may never wanna come back
you may stay lost inside yourself forever
just lingering there waiting to be drawn out
feel   pull   push   fight
just be
thats enough for now i went to deep!

Do You Know Where You Are?

©  NsM

a thought induced coma
paralyzed in motion
secret world of living in ones mind
content to proceed
willing to disobey
uncontrollable
comfort holds you
draws you near
captivates your mind
makes you seek a desire
feeling want come upon your skin
tranquil where you are
nothing more nothing less
paradise within
all becomes beautiful
headspin
window to the soul
depth so deep you need to go in further
find it
feel it
bring it to the surface
touch what needs to be reached
reach down and pull it the fuck out
there is no more time to be stuck
you are here...right fucking here!

Do You Feel?

©  NsM

if i love   and you love   and she loves   and he loves   ...do you feel loved?
if just when you feel so fuckin down and your willing to give up...can you feel something?
if moments can be replaced by memories...memories replaced by moments...is that hope?
if no one else in the world seems to understand what loves mean to you...do you give up?
if your heart wants something so bad it will search and find what it needs... do you trust fate?
if you never took a chance at just being...do you think life would just knock on your door?
if you were scared and hidden so you would never hurt again...would your heart ever grow?
if you could hold tight to each time you smiled inside out and felt alive...could you ever let go?
...do you feel?

Did You Speak to Me?

©  NsM

i heard you before you spoke
sensed your being
wanted to feel flesh in the raw
c r a v i n g that smell that lingers
emotions touched
depths beyond deep levels
no being present
transformed thoughts
feelings erupt
pouring life before me
where are you?

Desire...

©  NsM

bulges of flesh handfuls of lust
a moments desire slaps skin on skin
without thought its raw with beauty
so fresh it's animalistic
natural in all senses
instincts kick in
hunted is the mind
ready to pounce
eager to bite
smell the heat
intoxified lust venom
surging to electrify
wanting to sting
leaving a mark
the mark of lust
print of passion
a burst of fluid
dripping life...
runs out
pours down
shivers
more is the desire
for you have tasted
lust on your lips
life dripped into you
you have tasted poured out being...

Depth of the Mind...

©  NsM

lushful bulges of flesh
hunted
desire by the handful
teased
pleasure in abundance
wanted
tormented beyond control
tempted
seeking depth outward
needed
explosion upon contact...

dare me to tease
tempt me to want
need me to explore
deep into my mind...

O0O0O0O0O0CONTINUMO0O0O0O0O0

©  NsM

spinning circles of a fragile matter
being ever so careful not to shatter
holding tight
becoming one
no end or beginning!
just one giant middle
embracing tight
holding on
from here to there will get you
from there to here will find you
complete all as one
continuum


where you begin
where you end
here to there
one leading one following
never-ending
flow of circles...inside of a circle!
a circle of being that feeds off the roundness of the continuum...


spin circles with me!

COMFORT IN CIRCLES... CIRCLES OF COMFORT

©  NsM

touched by a moment from a few simple words
choose them wisely for they will be felt
they could change what happens tomorrow
or hold on tight to what happens today

see who you are becoming
move forward with each phase
stand tall so your able to look back
walk forward so you have a place to return

reach for those who need you
hold out to those that are lost
show them its ok to find a way
teach them to feel deep within

Combusting...

©  NsM

i close my eyes and allow all to pour out nothing flows
if i open my mind and question everything i get stuck
thoughts disapear when i want them to shine
the ones that shine i want to bury deep
some are so fast they are forgotten
others linger so long they eat away
prying deep into spots that want to be left alone
spots that need to be touched but cause heartache
so why go there...why not avoid...let them remained sealed
sealed in emotion that blinds
concealed within trapped under a smile
a smile that covers all making you forget
holding your heart in upturned lips
lips that smile a contagious smile
and speak more then words could ever communicate
a smile that came from covering pain
metamorphosing into a happy moment
a moment where you feel a smile change
something you hold within
releasing pain and heartache in a smile...

Can You See a Whisper?

©  NsM

i feel...
shivers through my soul
my skin crawling with energy
goosebumped
pulse rising
intensity
flesh yearning
desire
want
a need to taste life
touched
stimulated
tummy butterflies
tingly
anxious
intensity rising
trembling with anticipation
knowing
smiling
feeling
electrified flow
perked on the edge
flustered
pumped with passion
ready to explode
no longer wanting to contain what needs to be set free...

Can You Just Be?

©  NsM

where do you stand?
are you alone?
will you reach for my hands?
are you brave enough to bare your soul?
can you cry?
could you share all of you?
will you ask for what you need?
do you feel?
would you tell a secret of your own?
are you ready to believe?
can you change your way of thinking?
do you know where to begin?
where you should end?
could you find your way?
will you trust?
do you understand?
are you willing to love and hurt all at once?
will you spin till you fall?
could you pick yourself up?
do you know what it means to be rescued?
are you alright?
can you accept fate?
could you find yourself if you got lost?
do you know where you would go?
will you allow yourself to be coloured?
are you alive inside?
can you become all that you want?
do you know what life tastes like?
would you run each time you got scared?
are you strong enough to know when your weak?
can you speak every feeling you feel?
will you speak the language of your soul?
do you know what a moment can do?
will you listen?
can you hear words of nothing something anything everything?
... if you only knew

Can You Hear Nothing?

©  NsM

Nothing is what i hold in my hands
Silence is what i contain
Certainty is unknown
Destination terminated
I remain safe in a circle
Protected from me...

not even a thought
nothing
blank
silenced
in a hush
controlled by nothing
optimal performance
mind regulated
still
yet moving to belong
so not to look odd or peculiar
absorbing nothing
transforming
becoming
understanding
here i am
shouting out whispers
taunting life
enjoying the magnitude silence can deliver
pssssssssst...

Can I Offer you a Bite?

©  NsM

yesterday slams you out
pushes you into tomorrow
then tomorrow slaps you in the face with today
is today any different then yesterday or tomorrow?
what if tomorrow never happens?
will you be ok with today?
is it to late to change yesterday?
living in today
so ready to forget yesterday
eager to welcome tomorrow
stop
slow down
why you rushing to close out now?
you are not allowed to pick
fate has hold of you
right now
this very moment
you are right where you need to be!
here
living and breathing
tasting today
wanting tomorrow
remembering yesterday
...

Bring your own Jar...

©  NsM

running wild in the grass... laughing
stopping for a moment... waiting
the flicker captures the eye...desire
one flash leads to many... reaction
you become like an animal... instinct
chase sets in...eager
swipe
one lil firefly flickering in my jar... smile
now a part of the flickering game... tease
tempting the others closer... intrigue
attracted beyond control... amazed
captive and flashing... love
wonder sets in.. .thinking
release
                                                                                feeling

... breathe

©  NsM

breathe....

        fingers take over and just listen to the mind...the mind becomes at ease and carefree   ...strolling around desperate for connection...wanting a desire...searching for the unknown..
                                                             ...connect...reach...find ...join...
bring everything together or it won't touch that spot... you'll hit it and never be able to come back...crossing the line leads you so far into it there is  nothing left to do but explore and become familiar....get lost inside....find where your supposed to be...
                                                                                 ...just be....
be what you are...be who you are...be braver then yesterday...be alive and openminded.....
                                                                                      ...be...

BraiN CrampS...

©  NsM

today the silence is silent
not the normal quiet that can be rather pleasuresome
but the quiet that makes you seek noise
when the silence whispers nothingness
so empty the whisper screams
nothing at all
craving silent noise, the loud comforting kind...

Bouncing Ball...

©  NsM
   
the ball never stops bouncing and the puzzle just keeps getting bigger... magnify


broken to some
open to others
held captive
gently guided
pushed along
dragged behind
follow ahead...lead a shadow

bouncing ball of emotion
dribbling out life

feel when the mind gives up
a fractured heart repairs itself
like a unique puzzle of personification
each individual piece belongs in the most perfect spot
no two pieces are ever the same...a match is needed to close the holes
distinct parts of a story, a legacy, a life...
one chance is all we are given, just one!

Bliss is Achieved...

©  NsM

A genuine mind manipulator
flesh eater
pleasure seeker
hunted!
raw...

drizzled in colour
painted out before you
like a map with arrows
X marks the spot
...
neck
elbows
ankles
earlobes
eyelids
kneepits
armpits
shoulders
...
XXX marks the spot

a hunger inside that forces you to feed
so much control you loose it
out of control yet so in control
lost
drifting
away
almost lost in pleasure...
in a different world
above all others
never wanting to come back down
soar in that moment
hold it
hold it
tighter
slow down
your going overboard
your almost to far
no stopping now
you couldn't if you wanted to
... your out of control

Blah Blah effen BLAH

©  NsM

hmmmm what kinda randomness should i let out tonight?  i have a passion for WoRdS...sometimes they come out just the way ya want them to, other times you can loose what or where you were trying to go! is it so bad to get lost? allowing thoughts to come out without being processed...spilling text onto white.... filling blanks with foreverness...making a mark...staining a moment in time...letting your guard down long enough to allow others in!!!! escaping where your mind takes you...following the lead of a previous thought...lingering in that moment staying close enough to be ~held~yet wandering in search of where to go next? feeling what is being absorbed...tasting release...seeing thoughts appear...hearing that voice...relax your mind...feel lost for a moment, let the thoughts collide and play amongst themselves!~pleasuring~teasing~tempting~your mind to go deeper into areas you normally keep hidden...~unspoken~sheltered~protected~afraid they may be read wrong, interpreted without learning to be read between the lines~manipulated~placed in the spot wrong/wrong spot MISUNDERSTOOD.............................................FUCK IT when you constantly think before you speak you deny yourself sharing what needs to be let out...for some reason this tends to be different when you write what comes to mind...no thinking! just RAW words, no worrying bout what came out or what will come next! PoEtRy in a form only one with an open mind can relate....learning to feel the words with more then just your eyes...wanting to be heard without speaking a sound...think i may be done now..lemme go back and read and filter and change all the blurted out fucked up shit i was typin without thinking where i was going... wait a minute if i did that i would delete it all...BlAh bLaH fUcKiNg BlAh

Begin by Loving YOU...

©  NsM

standing still or moving forward
holding tight or letting go
touched or untouched
felt
desire for more
even if it hurts
the heart never stops wanting
it knows what it needs to feel complete
self love is the beginning
outer love is easy to show
inner love takes some work
being loved is hardest even though it is what we want...
how easy it is to love another
how hard it becomes to allow someone to love us
you deserve to be loved!
it will move you
flip your whole world upside down
cradle you when your in need of comfort
shelter you when you become scared
push you forward when you need courage
hold you ever so tight for no reason at all
answer all your questions
question all your answers
a force so powerful you loose all control
once loved
suddenly nothing matters
everything just feels right
smiling becomes easier
loving yourself just happens
like a contagious disease
you can not avoid
love reaches deep down inside
self love lasts forever
leads us into tomorrows
helps us search...

Becoming Me...

©  NsM

thought it was do time for some words...
i have realized as of late i can't write unless i am listening to some kinda music, music that does something for my soul' it just stimulates the flow i guess, i haven't inked on paper in a long while either, kinda feels as if i am at a spot in my lifetime that is a lil preoccupied doing other things, me being me i guess... all part of becoming' i keep learning more about myself and life and love, and acceptance and the beauty of depth' it's such a wicked thing to learn that it's ok to age, to grow up, to want to be more...  leaving behind words shows growth, change, depth, progression'

BE LOUD SO YOU CAN QUIET THE NOISE>>>

©  NsM

hushed lips hold secret silences
lingering ears hear louder when all is quiet
eyes that see before the mind can filter
thoughts enter and erupt the thinking process
subjective to something you spoke or heard or seen or thought you seen or heard or spoke
silenced looks of sound ignited
a whisper in a frown a smile in a scream
twisted thinking thoughts spoken seen heard
questioned until manipulated
rubbing together exfoliating depths of more
blending this into that
transforming silences ...

You in there? or am I out there?

©  NsM

I shout at me to stop being silent
Speak words to me please
Help my mind to flow
I'm tired of being trapped
I need to splatter a mess
Reaching deep into my soul
Searching depths
So thick it holds me still
Wanting me to sink
Like sand dripping in the hour glass
I keep flipping my mind over
Hoping to restart
Some cascading flow of something
Ignite me
Spark a moment
Fire up my being
Show me what is being held captive
Under protection even from me
Pull me out from wherever I am
I'm ready to flow...

Are You Feeling Fuckerish Today?

©  NsM
why are ppl so frightened from truths?
they ask how we feel but do they really want to listen to an answer?
conversations would last for days if we really expressed how we were feeling...
so why is it we usually give one word responses?
yet one of the first things we are taught as babies is to express our feelings...
hush lil baby don't you cry...
use your big girl/ boy words and tell me whats a matter!
why are you feeling this way??
... what happened to that? where in our daily lives did we decide saying" i'm fine" would do?
one of my most favorite questions to ask those i love and care about is " how are you feeling?"
yet no one really ever wants to answer me in more then one word...
being the exception "thankyou...how bout you?"
has it really become to much of a question?
how are you feeling today?



... thank you i'm fine really now fuck off!

Are You Brave Enough?

©  NsM

step into my  fictitious mind with your scrumptious being
erotic attachment
all is whole
just as you are        soul bent backwards
willing to please
beg if you  might
control
obey your master you lil bitch
whipped into submission
twisted approval
touched
explicit contact
turn your head if your not a sick  freakaleak
pretend to ignore
rather then explore
seduction in the air
open your mind
find what is pleasure
feel where lust comes from
raw with desire
captured   held    confined
intrigued
adrenaline is the high
willing to obey just so you can see what comes next...

Just Another Day of Appreciating Life...

©  NsM

feeling words someone speaks crawl deep down inside you
squirming  into your nerves
triggering senses that explode on contact
penatrating the toughest of beings
delving deep inside spreading faster with each breath
wanting more....no control    out of control    so in control....
words of nothing...more then words can ever say....whisper a secret in my ear!
                      ~saying nothing at all yet telling  more then you ever imagined~
                                           ...speak what you need to share....
                    allow your mind to be so comfortable it can't help but let go
                                                          listen to feel    feel to listen

Come to me in Words...

©  NsM

you are my angel
never hide your wings
open them wide so i can climb inside
you are my angel
my guiding light
that thing i pray for with all my might
show me what love feels like
hold me tight in your embrace
teach me to feel without ache in my heart
promise me everything will be ok
show me how to reach inside and pull out a rainbow
feel me needing you
show me my angel
just what love does...
please my angel feel me needing you
just a moment is all i ask for
tell me i'm doing alright
that everything is going to be ok
just knock over the garbage can
or blow out a candle
brush the hair from off my face
whisper nothing down the back of my neck
run your finger across my lips
make the dog bark at nothing at all
turn on the stereo when i walk past
put a smile upon my lips when i least expect it
send goosebumps over me from head to toe
make the light flicker long after it's been turned off
take something of mine and change it's spot
something nothing everything anything
stimulate me with deja vu
even a thought, or a slight smell
yell out my name and make me turn around
reach for something at the same time as me
ignite me with energy
comfort my soul
cradle my heart
place words deep into my mind
make a wish with me when the clock attracts
11:11

Angel of Colour...

©  NsM

you are my angel
never hide your wings
open them wide so i can climb inside
you are my angel
my guiding light
that thing i pray for with all my might
show me what love feels like
hold me tight in your embrace
teach me to feel without ache in my heart
promise me everything will be ok
show me how to reach inside and pull out a rainbow
feel me needing you
show me my angel
just what love does...

All in or you will never know...

©  NsM

...everything's fine                                                          
i'm loosing my mind...                                         comfort
...lost inside myself loosing my mind
loose and free' no where to be found...        in a carefree moment!



wipe that smirk from off your lips
lost in a dream of a non existant reality
waves crash in
the sun beams down
no one hurts
silence comforts...
echos heal wounds
the heart repairs itself
everyone smiles, and prances about in a fake reality
touched by life
handed another chance
try your luck again, if you don't spin how would you ever win?
gambling with your heart
with the biggest bet on the line...

Abundance...

©  NsM

you ever notice how life just happens
how fucked one day can be...
either pleasantly on your side, or wickedly against you...


how fast a moment can pass by without even realizing till you want it back
or how moments linger so slowly they pause your entire world and stop clocks from counting



lingering in limbo
forward or backward
sure yet unsure
balancing on that divine peak...


fueled by one's inhibitions to desire more
believing in one's self
triggered by moments in time
the stand still kind
e l a p s e d b e i n g
when days blend into weeks; minutes into seconds
simply
living
to
just
be
...

A Never Ending Search...

A NEVER ENDING SEARCH

©  NsM

some seek out in desperation
some from boredom
others want more
some have no fucking clue
some just know
they feel this something calling out for them
drawing them closer with intrigue
wanting to know what is held captive
willing to go to so many depths
knowing something is wanting you
what  it is remains a mystery
tangling you in to mingle
needing you
twisting your mind trying to figure it out
you will spend a lifetime in search of
wanting like no other ever needed
the answer will never come
for you would give up searching
and have no place to go...
searching never stops
the direction lingering forever
leading you
pulling you
toward a trail of comfort
follow the path that leads
something is out here calling for you...

slip... slower... deeper...

©  NsM

wanting to get lost deep within
knowing you'll be forever touched
realizing the memory will last forever
it's to late now there is no way back
the path vanished the first step you took
ahead is the only way you can go
fate will pull you in the right direction
just pay attention and follow all the signs
allow them to show you a journey
get tangled in the web they weave
spiral and sink and feel like your floating
.....slip.....slower......deeper.....just feel!

A Moment in Time...

©  NsM

A moment in time captured in words... when words are all one has to express what is trapped inside... things that need to cascade out and show life... a smile is contagious... in a circle i spin... i spin in a circle... i would die to feel angels wings embracing me eternally... i long for that hug that lasts way to long... i question what comes after death? is it really worth living through the wait? a mind can wander but it will always find a way home... an open mind is good for the soul... just a start to a finish... an end to a beginning... a flow of certainty... just knowing...if moments pass by and time stands still will eternity spin in a circle?...beyond existence lives a world where souls dance... where spirits soar and mingle and embrace... thoughts are what matters and sometimes no words need to be exchanged to feel and know what those thoughts speak... a hearts only desire is to love... to grow in love... to feel full of love... to give love...in a world full of illusion i find comfort in being just what i want to be...misplaced somewhere in time enjoying the moment without feeling lost...

11~11

© NsM

alright...
so here goes it!

has nothing to do with time...
you feel it...
it pulls you to look...
it creates energy...

11:11
It's like you suddenly know the secret to the secrets...

if moments can change who we become could we not change what becomes of a moment?
thoughts simple or complex can empower beings like no other resource...

soul fuel

we have a direct effect on the world around us
our thoughts are affecting the physical world in which we live
in a moment one could change many

... kinda like a pay it forward
"do onto others as you would have done onto you"
why not one step forward and be more then you want to have done onto you?

a positive forces a negative to seek it's own kind...

in that very moment simple thoughts could change tomorrows, i think that's why i say 11:11 make a wish, something i have never stopped believing in... uh huh i said it i believe!

glimpsing backwards in a forward deja vu...